Controversial tennis player Bernard Tomic is now a Gold Coast Titan.

Tomic planned the move with best mate Jarryd Hayne.

‘I was partying with the Hayne Playne and said I was bored with tennis, there’s no challenge anymore. The Planester started digging and got me a gig,’ said Tomic. ‘I’m the greatest tenniser ever, done things normal people couldn’t imagine. May as well try something new.’

Tomic debuts against Cronulla on Saturday July 15th, starting on the left wing.

‘Being a winger gonna’s be mad fun. Hayney’s gonna give me the ball and I’ll race away and score heaps of tries. Then me and Jay Hay will tear up the Goldy’s nightspots.’

Hayne is excited about Tomic joining the Titans. ‘I’m sick of the media saying I’m the only selfish player on the team. Now Tommo’s with us, they can blame someone else when we lose.’

The Forward Pass is a fictional and deliberately ridiculous look at the NRL. References to real people is for satirical purposes only.