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The Forward Pass: What’s Ricky’s Shock Move?

The fake news that’s actually fake.

With three weeks left and no chance of playing finals, Canberra coach Ricky Stuart is replacing the first grade team with Mounties players (Canberra’s NSW Cup feeder team).

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”We’ve got bugger-all hope of beating Easts, Souths and the Warriors, so as well give the Mounties boys a run,” Stuart said. “It’s a complete reversal of the batting order. Even our good players – like Rapana, Cotric and Tapine – will play NSW Cup for Mounties. Our normal first graders could use a kick up the backside and learn how to hold onto a bloody lead.”

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Injured captain Jarrod Croker and suspended fullback Jack Wighton will spend the next three weeks mentoring the Mounties as they step into the NRL.

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Stuart denied he was ‘giving up’ on his team. “Tell me what’s worse, playing the same bunch of guys who keep losing, or a bunch of kids who’ll give it a decent crack? If we beat Easts, I’ll be a genius. If we lose, I can say the boys tried hard but were outclassed. We might even dig up some first graders for next year.“

“I know the Raiders have shot themselves in the foot – a lot, but I’m looking forward to getting them in a Mounties jersey for our last two games and the finals,” Mounties Intrust Super Premiership NSW coach Ryan Carr said. “It’ll help us and the Raiders boys can play footy and have fun. As long as they remember the game goes for 80 minutes, we’ll be fine.”

The Forward Pass is a fictional and deliberately ridiculous look at the NRL. References to real people is for satirical purposes only. Check it out on Twitter @thefwdpass

 

 

 

Deputy Sports Editor for the Australian Times Weekly

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