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The Forward Pass: The Dragons’ Unique Mad Monday

The fake news that’s actually fake.

St. George-Illawarra coach Paul McGregor has announced the club’s unique Mad Monday celebrations.

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”On Monday September 10, we’re gonna get dressed up in silly costumes, grab some beers, go down to Kogarah Oval, lock the doors…and watch full replays of all our losses, starting with the round seven Warriors loss and ending with our elimination final loss that weekend.”

’Mary’ said the marathon video session was designed to punish the players after another post-Origin fade out.

“The boys don’t deserve a proper Mad Monday, so after the video session, they’re going to do laps until the players either cry or vomit their beer, whichever comes first. I don’t know how much longer I’ll have this job, so may as well show them who’s boss while I can.”

To ensure maximum attendance, Mary printed flyers advertising a classic Simpsons marathon.

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”I got some TAFE kids to draw Simpsons characters on the flyer to make it look authentic,” McGregor said.

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“I can’t wait for Mad Monday,” Gareth Widdop said. “Been watching all my favourite Simpons eps to prepare and getting my Bart costume ready. It’s going to be a blast. Better than going to a pub and getting harassed by drunk idiots.”

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The Forward Pass is a fictional and deliberately ridiculous look at the NRL. References to real people is for satirical purposes only. Check it out on Twitter @thefwdpass

Deputy Sports Editor for the Australian Times Weekly

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