Rugby League Satire

The Forward Pass: What is Stuart’s Unique Punishment?

The fake news that’s actually fake. Canberra coach Ricky Stuart revealed his unique punishment following the Raiders' close loss to the Gold Coast last weekend, following nine losses by 10 points or less last season. http://gty.im/671056548 "I was so mad that I cancelled...

The Forward Pass: What’s Cleary’s solution for the Tigers?

The fake news that’s actually fake. Wests Tigers coach Ivan Cleary has a novel solution for his team's horror start to 2018....make a playing comeback. Cleary will captain-coach the Tigers during the first six rounds against the Sydney Roosters, Mel00bourne (in Melbourne...

The Forward Pass: Who Won the NRLZ?

The fake news that’s actually fake. Newcastle won the inaugural NRLZ title, defeating the New Zealand Warriors in the grand final at the MCG on Saturday night. http://gty.im/923635732 Mitchell Pearce and Kalyn Ponga scored Kentucky Fried Tries (scored from the attacking team's half...

The Forward Pass: What’s the NRL’s exciting new competition?

The fake news that’s actually fake. The NRL has launched an innovative pre-season competition. The KFC NRLZ – created by NRL CEO Todd Greenberg – will be played from Thursday March 1 to Saturday March 3 in Brisbane, Sydney and Melbourne, with...

The Forward Pass: the NRL’s New Themed Round

  The fake news that’s actually fake. The NRL will open 2018 with a special themed round. Desperate to win back the angry, old white men they offended with Macklemore's grand final performance, round one 2018 will be 'Dinosaur Round'. "It's similar to the...

The Forward Pass: North Queensland’s Surprise Recruits

The fake news that’s actually fake. North Queensland have named two unknown players for Sunday's grand final at Homebush. Jack Notsruht and Michael Ttocs will join an extended bench. The pair look absolutely nothing like these current injured Cowboys: http://gty.im/847750400 http://gty.im/800237670 Paul Green has specific plans for...

The Forward Pass: The Sudden Grand Final Move

The fake news that’s actually fake. NRL CEO Todd Greenberg announced this Sunday's grand final will be moved to Suncorp Stadium. http://gty.im/841871522 With no NSW teams, Greenberg wanted to avoid another embarrassingly low crowd in Sydney. The Holden Cup grand final and State...

The Forward Pass: Who Wore it Best?

The fake news that’s actually fake. With the footy finals nearing its climax, it's easy to forget about Mad Monday. The Forward Pass fearlessly went undercover to judge the top five Mad Monday costumes. Jordan Rapana and BJ Leilua as Walter White and Jesse...

The Forward Pass: Nine’s Unique Finals Coverage

The fake news that’s actually fake. Channel Nine unveiled their unique telecast plans for Saturday night's Sydney Roosters v North Qld Preliminary Final. Nine will axe their usual two hour pre-game show for an exclusive documentary: From Eastern Suburbs to Sydney: A Comprehensive Roosters...

The Forward Pass: Who’s Following Their Boxing Dream?

The fake news that’s actually fake. Paul Gallen returns to boxing later this year, fighting Jeff Horn in a massive free-to-air event in Brisbane. http://gty.im/805868818 "I've done heaps of thinking after the Cowboys loss. I need a break from ignorant fans and biased...

The Forward Pass: Which Referee is Coming Back?

The fake news that’s actually fake. Frustrated by the criticism after the first finals weekend, veteran referee Bill Harrigan is making a special return for the remaining 2017 finals. http://gty.im/924393 "I'm sick and tired of the hopeless referees and Bunker literally killing our...

The Forward Pass: Shock World Cup Change

The fake news that’s actually fake. The Rugby League World Cup will be reduced to only four official matches. "We're kidding ourselves that it's a 'World' Cup when only Australia, New Zealand and England are competitive," said NRL CEO Todd Greenberg. "We're...

The Forward Pass: Who’s Sabotaging the Storm?

The fake news that’s actually fake. With the Melbourne Storm seemingly destined for another premiership, a controversial shock jock is doing his best to sabotage them. http://gty.im/841874714 Cyril Lawman, host of Sydney's infamous lunchtime talkback radio show Rock Bottomer, has spent this week...

The Forward Pass: Gutherson’s Exciting New Project

The fake news that’s actually fake. Parramatta's Clint Gutherson is a budding YouTube superstar. http://gty.im/531294422 Inspired by his 'wardrobe malfunction' at the Parramatta awards night, Gutherson launched 'Gutho's Great House Tips' last week. http://gty.im/157631919 Topics include: - How to vacuum the floors without leaving the couch. -...

The Forward Pass: What’s the NRL’s shock finals move?

The fake news that’s actually fake. The NRL has banned the Bunker for the 2017 finals series. http://gty.im/668733124 After two years of controversy, NRL CEO Todd Greenberg finally admitted the Bunker was a giant mess, "I've tried to ignore all the bad feedback,...

The Forward Pass: What’s Channel Nine’s Bold Origin Idea?

NSW will name their 2018 Origin coach...through reality TV. With nobody interested in replacing Laurie Daley, Channel Nine agreed to broadcast Who Wants to Coach the NSW Blues? over summer. http://gty.im/689855930 Nine CEO Hugh Marks explained the concept, "everyone knows being Blues...

The Forward Pass: Jarryd Hayne’s new mission

The fake news that’s actually fake. Jarryd Hayne has quit rugby league and is destined to be Australia's next sprinting superstar. "I'm sick of rugby league," said an 'injured' Hayne after watching his Gold Coast Titans lose to Parramatta last Thursday night. "The...

The Forward Pass: NRL announces grand final entertainment

The fake news that's actually fake. Former Oasis frontman Liam Gallagher is the NRL's 2017 grand final entertainment. http://gty.im/826222764 Desperate to avoid last year's Richie Sambora trainwreck, Gallagher was an early pick for NRL CEO Todd Greenberg. http://gty.im/461481886 "Liam is perfect, he was an iconic...

The Forward Pass: What is Canterbury’s Shock Name Change?

The fake news that's actually fake. Canterbury-Bankstown announced a name change for 2018. Desperate to avoid more bad publicity, the Bulldogs will be renamed the "Cuddly Puppies". This is the new mascot: http://gty.im/469633228 'Canterbury prides itself on being the "family" club. We're sick of the...

The Forward Pass: What’s the NRL’s Generous Deed?

The fake news that's actually fake. The Western Force - axed from Super Rugby - will play in the NRL from 2018. http://gty.im/814883070 Rebranded the Perth Force, their inclusion finally addresses the constant rumours of a new Perth NRL team. The Force will adopt...
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